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52 Films By Women: The Dilemma of Desire (2020)

The Dilemma of Desire

The Dilemma of Desire

By Andrea Thompson

If you didn't know what you were getting into with the SXSW documentary “The Dilemma of Desire,” it gets right to the point by trying to find the clitoris in the original Gray's Anatomy. (The MEDICAL book people, not the series. Get your mind out of the gutter.) Not only is it apparently nowhere to be found on the page it's listed in the table of contents, but there's also no pictures of female anatomy, while the male sexual organs, including the penis, are meticulously depicted. “It's almost as if they wiped womanhood out of the text,” mused Stacey Dutton, a neuroscientist.

Dutton is an activist who has made it her mission to correct such omissions and outright fallacies in the scientific community. Her work was sparked by a confounding realization – she was a biologist who was teaching a class on the biology of womanhood, and she still had no idea what a clitoris looked like. A quick Google search led her to artist Sophia Wallace's work, who has her own story of being shocked at discovering that so much of what she was taught about her anatomy and sex itself turned out to be false. “It's akin to these ideas that we used to have in medieval times, that the universe revolved around the Earth,” Wallace stated. “It's a similar idea of what sex is, that it revolves around the straight male erection.” Thus does our introduction to cliteracy truly commence.

The Dilemma of Desire

The Dilemma of Desire

It won't exactly be a surprise that this overt silencing is the main thread of “The Dilemma of Desire,” but the brilliant thing is that many of the talking heads in the doc aren't talking heads at all, or rather, they're not scientists or the co-founder and VP of a sex toy company that emphasizes the female perspective and designs its products accordingly. They're women of various ages and races who are struggling to own their bodies and their sexuality. Many speak of repressive upbringings where they were told, either outright or in subtler fashion, that they had no right to their own pleasure. The more the doc unfolds, the clearer it becomes just how much this messaging permeates not just our culture but world culture, which shames women's sexuality while simultaneously using it to sell practically everything.

Ironically, this often gives women the illusion of power while depriving them of it, usually under a guise of liberation, where women can safely be encouraged to have sex as long as they cater to male pleasure. Easy targets like the porn industry come to mind, but “The Dilemma of Desire” is more interested in the big picture while sending a simple message that's anything but simplistic. Power, control, and how women are routinely deprived of both, is the main subject, but the true focus is on how women are taking back ownership of their lives and bodies in a world where fear of women's power, especially their sexual power, is reaching entirely new levels.

The Dilemma of Desire

The Dilemma of Desire

Such commitment means the inevitable Donald Trump mention doesn't occur until the last ten minutes of the film's nearly two hour runtime, and by then his mere symbolization of an ongoing sickness has long since become clear. Director Maria Finitzo may not speak or appear on-screen, but her presence is continual as she guides “The Dilemma of Desire” through the myriad complexities of its own topics, with a respect for her diverse subjects other filmmakers mostly dream of achieving. They were clearly well-chosen, as they do a fantastic job of articulating the message of empowerment Finitzo clearly wants to send, as each finds their own joy and freedom despite the many obstacles in their path to both.